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I'm New Here

by Goose

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1.
[Verse 1] Still ain’t found what I’m looking for but I enjoy the view Everyone put your cups up, cuz we made it through Small kid big city, a slight change of views Sitting on a barstool, still the same dude Just trying be successful like Drizzy in ‘09 I been drinking on some whiskey to pass the slow time And when I look up to the sky, I aint seen no signs It’s cold in Ohio, it’s even colder in the chi Let me take it back to before I knew what a uber was A shot of Malort and a couple Old Styles got me stupid buzzed Most of this is super-fl-ious, this still new to us On to the next one, I was just getting used to her Hoping when I call my mom I’m still the same son Trying to find out where I’m going when the day’s done I’ll find it someday, Pops told me to keep looking He ain’t have words to aid, just told me to keep pushing [Hook] I been drinking this whole night long And I keep thinking that I’m living life wrong Asked my roommate if he leave the light on Like maybe that’ll help me find home I been drinking this whole day long I took a wrong turn and can’t find way home Asked the homie if the light could stay on Maybe that’ll help me find my way home Maybe that’ll help me find my way home Maybe that’ll help me find my way home Asked the homie if the light could stay on Maybe that’ll help me find my way home [Verse 2] It’s been more than two years, but I feel new here So I’ve had a few beers, don’t know what to do here I’ve overcome a few fears We changing every few years, gotta keep a crew near Help me keep track of who I am and who I used to be Got me feeling bad for every new girl that’s pursuing me I’m constantly suspicious, honestly I’m vicious I’m doing girls dirty while she do my dirty dishes I just hope I’ve been burning the right bridges Investing in the right friendships, making the right decisions Just turned 26, it’s a motherfucker, man Time is a construct I don’t think I’ll ever understand I been faded too long, it’s that time of the party When your vision getting blurry and you kinda stop talking You nodding your head along, but you understand, hardly Step outside of the bar, yo where the fuck are we?
2.
[Hook] Don’t stand so, don’t stand so, close me though Don’t stand so, don’t stand so, close me no, Don’t stand so close to me girl Don’t stand so close to me girl [Verse 1] Why this bar so full, why this cup so empty Most these girls don’t tempt me, I ain’t never simping Simply, I ain’t catchin’ vibes and I ain’t like all this energy Sip your drink and just let me be Sorry boo boo, you’re gonna have to enunciate Cuz I’m way too fucked up to pick up on the subtle things I see you with your friends playing with the straw in your drink I’m a grumpy mother fucker so don’t even think About approaching me, don’t get so close to me That wasn’t a move, this aint an opening I’m just chilling in the corner, please don’t notice me I don’t look familiar, no you don’t know me I’m just here with the crew, I ain’t ordering you no drinks I might’ve done some things but that was the old me “You’re a jerk” yeah I know Girl keep it moving, have a nice night though [Verse 2] Please don’t stand so, close like we dance slow I been a handful, that was circumstantial Let my hand go, can’t be your man so Leave before it gets heavy like an anvil I don’t netflick, I don’t have chill I’m a glass of water and a couple Advil I know this won’t work, I know I’m a leave first I’m a push you away, I’m a proabbly be a jerk You’ll notice there’s only room for one at this table I’m like an indie rapper, I don’t like labels I don' don’t like stable, I good on my own It’s in your best interest to leave me alone I know it’s fucked up but I been in love One time is enough, I already did that drug I took another shot just to feel that buzz It’s time to leave, this place is crowded as fuck
3.
[Verse 1] She said, can you play me a Christmas song I checked the itunes, put Joni Mitchell River on She tried to sing along, she ain’t know the words I was sober bird, nursing shitty eggnog She wanted Yule long, I wanted to play the rest of Blue Thought to myself, this is a weird song undressing to But she was alright, still felt kinda wrong Busted all on her couch, shout out to phife dawg We met like a month ago, I ain’t frontin though She’s kinda cool, but I know where this gonna go She ain’t like me either, let’s be real I’m a flip if I hear another thing about vegan meals I was a nice dude, with some nice means Now she could probably find a thousand guys like me But I got a nice place, and we got heat I guess it’s a decent spot to spend the next nine weeks [Hook] She ain’t fine, but I mean, she’s fine I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime She ain’t gonna be my wife, but she can stay the night I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime You don’t wanna spend your winter, swiping right on tinder I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the winter [Verse 2] He said, can you tell me where the days gone? Played some Outkast, he said it sounds like the same song And his face long, I can tell he’s lost in it Lost his job, goin down and I’m still on the ship Its deeper than spending time girls you don’t wanna kick it with There’s shards of glass in the air, and certain levels of bitterness Now the days are shorter, so drink another porter Something dark and heavy, like what’s been weighing on your shoulders I know Chicago can get brutal during the winter months And you’re struggling to make enough to fill up your blunts Probably coulda done more to hit him with the proper feedback Explain that I been going through the same thing that he had De Ja Vu, I had seen that, recovery and relapse I know how every step forward is followed by like three back He shrugged his shoulders and passed me a cig I don’t know, fam. It is what it is [Hook] You could say you’re fine, but I know you’re lying I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime Just need a ray of light, to make it through the night I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime Man this can’t be right, god this can’t be life I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
4.
[hook] When I’m faced these obstacles, I may be illogical I’m so irresponsible, sorry I gotta go I gotta go, I gotta go I gotta go, I gotta go I faded and out of yo, too many shots of those Just so irresponsible, sorry I gotta go I gotta go, I gotta go I gotta go, I gotta go [Verse 1] On a Friday night, I think I had too much I ain’t feelin right, I might a screwed up I came here booed up, I got too boozed up Sometimes I loose touch, I’m a nuisance I might’a did her bad ,Don’t know what I did But I can tell she mad, I should smoke a cig This gon take min, I should tell her that But I fell right back, Bouncer gone whoop my ass She got her arms all crossed, Oh she don’t talk Shit I can barely walk, Blame it on the alcohol Sometimes I slip and fall, she aint having that I’m a blatant ass, sorry you can’t relate that I ask if she okay, she told me she’s all right I said her tone disagrees, she says it’s not a fight I asked if I can hit it later , she says not tonight Too many shots tonight, ain’t getting box tonight
5.
[Verse 1] A dirty breeze from the north, the cold weather is here Ash the square off the porch, I’ll do better this year Cuz if I do this any worse, they gon take me in a hearse Well before any friends or family will hear About my demise, lets work a compromise It’s time, put that yes sir and humility behind All the problems I’ve accosted, way too many losses Way too much nonsense from way too many bosses Waking up nauseous, motherfuck I lost it Pack my bags in the autumn now I’m ready the fall hit Did doubles in July, was exhausted in August Workin harder than all of yall, why I still ain’t got shit I’m about to flip it over, colder in October These wages ain’t gonna make old girl wish she never left you I’m campin in a vestibule, halls you went through Chapped lips, callused fingers, man all this shit I been due Approaching a door, wipe the feet on floor Enter with the confidence, like yeah I been here before Time to extort, I ain’t afraid to use force, of course Mask on my face, they got nothing to report Made a dash, got away, fled the building in silence Grab the bag, peep inside, walked away smiling And that’s just where my mind went, sitting in this cursed room Finish up this day dream, cuz I gotta get back to work soon
6.
Transparent 03:21
[Verse 1] I can see through you, transparent like purified water Everything’s beautified, nothing hubris-tied and falters We two humans tied, looking at the bluest skies and saunter We just wonder and wander, with no place to go, but It still feels like something we got control of, this whole love Ay girl hold up, just give it time to grow, love The sun shine through the looking glass, got me looking back Like when you said “I love you” you never took it back You knew more about me than I knew myself And when times was hard, never too proud to use my help And you’d go away for a while, I’d miss you like hell We always kept it true, never used lies or stealth But we were young, these were things we could get away with As we start to get older, shit gets a little more complicated We knew everything, cuz we were the only people we’ve ever dated Til one of us gets complacent, and then everything changes [Verse 2] … Things are starting to get kinda translucent Now I’m walking around clueless, I don’t know what to do, shit You settled down with a new dude, and I got a few chicks And it feels kinda useless, I know I’ve been stupid … Now every new girl kinda pales in comparison I dodge calls, ain’t tryin to move ford like Harrison Shit’s embarrassing, you trying to see through me Kinda cloudy, not too sure if you like the new me Asking questions, like this ain’t how you used to be What happened to you, this ain’t how it goes usually She’s trying to picture a future for us, and that’s when it gets blurry I can tell she wants that ring more than Steph Curry I’m just trying to do my own thing, damn what’s the hurry A few days go by, I don’t call and she starts to worry Check my phone, unread messages, she says I miss ya Then she sends one more, all right, now I get the picture [Bridge] Now I’ve seen more of the world, there’s not much out there for me Most days so cloudy, most nights are so stormy Most calls I’ve been ignoring, they just don’t seem important Now it’s all foreign, someone shoulda warned them All my lies are so shady, don’t know why you believe in them New girls try to save me, I’ll be out before the evening ends And that’s just how the season ends, we start all over That’s when I black out, now I don’t at all know her [Verse 3] Let me sit back, rip a six pack of ways to escape Empty word document, can’t find any proper ways to say Cant figure it out, I’m completely opaque Drink a domestic beer trying find the place where honesty stay I’m probably, constantly too lost in my ways Self-sabotage in the most boring obnoxious of ways Things will never be like they were back in the old days Fast years, slow days, wake up to a cold spray Brush my teeth, dry my face, still barely awake Every girl that ever moved me is married or engaged Maybe that’s why I act out, I black out, can’t hold liquor I wake in the morning sicker, things seem to go quicker Last time we spoke, you had a different last name I only changed my zip code and maybe I added weight I lost a couple numbers from girls I probably should date And I blocked you from ever being able to reach out to me Could’ve used your help, it’s clear now I see It’s clear now I see It’s clear now I see But it’s too late for me
7.
8.
[Verse 1] With the last little hope that’s buried in me Take it back the old school like elementary Still stuck in the middle like LMNOP Nod ya head to this BlacKeys, instrumental sings Take my time with the rhyme, such a sentimental thing Never know til I leave, what potential I bring All I wanted was the life that they show on silver screens Faced with D’Evils and Regrets that only Jigga’s seen I heard he gave old girl a promise and a silver ring That and this minimum wage been slowly killing me I just wanted the world, instead I came up empty handed Went from Pomp and Circumstances, to a life of certain frantic And often circumstances, the gods will hurt your chances I clean with soap, trying hide the dirt my hand’s touched I must have downed a thousand bottles, trying to drown my sorrows Climb up out of this stool, tell the fam I’ll see ya tomorrow [Verse 2] I stay in the city where they invented the two step Let me dust off this microphone 1-2 check I write a few checks, bills past due, stress Been flip flopping different options, that’s just what I do best I stay committed like, fuck this, who’s next? Another reason to play my cards close to dude’s vest You approach me like the sucker tatted on my face Wai til I finished my beer cuz really I hate to waste I offered you a sip, declined, said you hate the taste It didn’t quite mean the same, this is your fault It’s girls like you that tend to make the seasons change And I ain’t ever believe in change, this is your call Damn the world so large, kinda makes you feel miniscule I’m hypercritical, trying to throw you your axis, as if, Life isn’t cyclical, now I’m cynical, Every night I sip a brew, toast to the ritual [Outro] Now we at the Hancock Tower, Signature room Drinking a nine dollar beer, that should’ve been two Man I did it all, just to witness this view Still can’t help but to think this could’ve been you Now we at the Hancock Tower, Signature room Drinking a nine dollar beer, better make that two Spent my whole life, trying to get a glimpse of that view Overcome with this feeling that I should’ve had you [Hook] It’s like where I wanna go, who I be? In life, what the fuck I know, nothing’s guaranteed Cuz I, smoke a few cigs, drink a few beers I know it’s been a while, but I’m still new here
9.
[Verse 1] Back when I was 15, might had a big dream Destined to be making a living off a 16s My whole life was finna be, pristine, just see Then I started figuring out a bit of what this shit mean Kurt Cobain was a hero to most, but he aint mean shit to me Cuz I was on that hip hop back pack indie scene Before that flat bill, snap back, skinny jeans I wasn’t even skimming beats, I would rap on anything My favorite emcees, I would pretend to be Rap in front of the mirror but never invite my friends to see That’s when I would be, my own biggest enemy Cuz I thought it would happen eventually, even if I let it be Motherfucker, it was destiny I was on that pedigree, aint nobody better than me Regretably, I would let my nerves get the best of me Nine years later, now that dream rest in peace [Verse 2] Back when I was 21, we was having plenty fun Twice a week, heavy drunk, I was in love with everyone Dude, I think I mighta just met the one New girl, old crew, had a nice set up The glory days, before I knew what stress was Back when we’d get a second chance when we would mess up We’d drink the worst beers, but we’d have the best buzz Sharing a drink with your best buds And I ain’t even care what the score on the test was Cuz I was bound to land a job, gonna get the best one I was engulfed in the moment, didn’t care where I’d end up Never thought I’d fall so hard when that end come I had to leave the place where all of my friends was Plus that girl shitted on me, when she wanted to end us I was pushing brooms, trying to get some income Stuck in some hard times, never thought were meant for us [Verse 3] Shit now I’m the same age Big got smoked Decided to pack my bags, move to Chicago Don’t matter where I go, still I grow Just needed a change of scenery to instill my hope I know, I gotta fall back Steady applying to jobs, just praying for a call back And if I do get the call, I don’t know at all If I’m going in the right direction and all that Stuck in my mid 20s with a receding hairline Can’t afford cab fare, do you care if we share a ride Everyone’s getting married or having their own kids And I’m still getting comfortable in my own skin I keep burning the candle on both ends Until I stopped comparing me and them, they got their own shit And I’ll always accept a call, from an old friend Learned to stop worrying and enjoy this whole shit

about

Hey I'm Goose, and I'm new here.

This nine-track project took me damn near two years to complete and tells the story of my transition from a small town in Ohio to the big city. A lot of these songs were the first I wrote and recorded since moving to Chicago.

Since moving to Chicago in the summer of 2013, I've seen my share of ups and downs. I've lost friends, gained friends, burnt bridges, and built bonds with people I've only known a short while. I've felt like the smallest person in the city, I've felt like the world was mine for the taking.

Even though I've been here going on three years now, I'm still discovering new things about this city. I still look up at the tall buildings, and I'm still getting lost looking for the nearest Red Line stop. I'm New Here.

Thanks: Mylo, SVNTY6, KC, Emma, BlacKeys, DJ Agent M, Sports BF, Top $, Ski, ThoVo, kbanz, Hoist crew, FTRSNDMTRX, and everyone whose come out to show.

credits

released May 1, 2016

Via: Hoist and FTRSNDMTRX

Production by: DJ Agent M, SVNTY6, ThoVo, BlacKeys, Goose.

Mixing and mastering by: DJ Agent M, SVNTY6, BlacKeys, Emma Gyger, KC the Audio Guy.

Featured performers: MPYRE, Top $ Raz, Sports Boyfriend, Ski.

Album art: Mylo Reyes via Hoist

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Goose Chicago, Illinois

Writer, rapper, and fan. Not always in that order.

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