1. |
Leave the Light On
03:26
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[Verse 1]
Still ain’t found what I’m looking for but I enjoy the view
Everyone put your cups up, cuz we made it through
Small kid big city, a slight change of views
Sitting on a barstool, still the same dude
Just trying be successful like Drizzy in ‘09
I been drinking on some whiskey to pass the slow time
And when I look up to the sky, I aint seen no signs
It’s cold in Ohio, it’s even colder in the chi
Let me take it back to before I knew what a uber was
A shot of Malort and a couple Old Styles got me stupid buzzed
Most of this is super-fl-ious, this still new to us
On to the next one, I was just getting used to her
Hoping when I call my mom I’m still the same son
Trying to find out where I’m going when the day’s done
I’ll find it someday, Pops told me to keep looking
He ain’t have words to aid, just told me to keep pushing
[Hook]
I been drinking this whole night long
And I keep thinking that I’m living life wrong
Asked my roommate if he leave the light on
Like maybe that’ll help me find home
I been drinking this whole day long
I took a wrong turn and can’t find way home
Asked the homie if the light could stay on
Maybe that’ll help me find my way home
Maybe that’ll help me find my way home
Maybe that’ll help me find my way home
Asked the homie if the light could stay on
Maybe that’ll help me find my way home
[Verse 2]
It’s been more than two years, but I feel new here
So I’ve had a few beers, don’t know what to do here
I’ve overcome a few fears
We changing every few years, gotta keep a crew near
Help me keep track of who I am and who I used to be
Got me feeling bad for every new girl that’s pursuing me
I’m constantly suspicious, honestly I’m vicious
I’m doing girls dirty while she do my dirty dishes
I just hope I’ve been burning the right bridges
Investing in the right friendships, making the right decisions
Just turned 26, it’s a motherfucker, man
Time is a construct I don’t think I’ll ever understand
I been faded too long, it’s that time of the party
When your vision getting blurry and you kinda stop talking
You nodding your head along, but you understand, hardly
Step outside of the bar, yo where the fuck are we?
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2. |
Don't Stand So...
02:23
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[Hook]
Don’t stand so, don’t stand so, close me though
Don’t stand so, don’t stand so, close me no,
Don’t stand so close to me girl
Don’t stand so close to me girl
[Verse 1]
Why this bar so full, why this cup so empty
Most these girls don’t tempt me, I ain’t never simping
Simply, I ain’t catchin’ vibes and I ain’t like all this energy
Sip your drink and just let me be
Sorry boo boo, you’re gonna have to enunciate
Cuz I’m way too fucked up to pick up on the subtle things
I see you with your friends playing with the straw in your drink
I’m a grumpy mother fucker so don’t even think
About approaching me, don’t get so close to me
That wasn’t a move, this aint an opening
I’m just chilling in the corner, please don’t notice me
I don’t look familiar, no you don’t know me
I’m just here with the crew, I ain’t ordering you no drinks
I might’ve done some things but that was the old me
“You’re a jerk” yeah I know
Girl keep it moving, have a nice night though
[Verse 2]
Please don’t stand so, close like we dance slow
I been a handful, that was circumstantial
Let my hand go, can’t be your man so
Leave before it gets heavy like an anvil
I don’t netflick, I don’t have chill
I’m a glass of water and a couple Advil
I know this won’t work, I know I’m a leave first
I’m a push you away, I’m a proabbly be a jerk
You’ll notice there’s only room for one at this table
I’m like an indie rapper, I don’t like labels
I don' don’t like stable, I good on my own
It’s in your best interest to leave me alone
I know it’s fucked up but I been in love
One time is enough, I already did that drug
I took another shot just to feel that buzz
It’s time to leave, this place is crowded as fuck
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3. |
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[Verse 1]
She said, can you play me a Christmas song
I checked the itunes, put Joni Mitchell River on
She tried to sing along, she ain’t know the words
I was sober bird, nursing shitty eggnog
She wanted Yule long, I wanted to play the rest of Blue
Thought to myself, this is a weird song undressing to
But she was alright, still felt kinda wrong
Busted all on her couch, shout out to phife dawg
We met like a month ago, I ain’t frontin though
She’s kinda cool, but I know where this gonna go
She ain’t like me either, let’s be real
I’m a flip if I hear another thing about vegan meals
I was a nice dude, with some nice means
Now she could probably find a thousand guys like me
But I got a nice place, and we got heat
I guess it’s a decent spot to spend the next nine weeks
[Hook]
She ain’t fine, but I mean, she’s fine
I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime
She ain’t gonna be my wife, but she can stay the night
I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime
You don’t wanna spend your winter, swiping right on tinder
I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime
I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the wintertime
I guess it’s something that’ll get me through the winter
[Verse 2]
He said, can you tell me where the days gone?
Played some Outkast, he said it sounds like the same song
And his face long, I can tell he’s lost in it
Lost his job, goin down and I’m still on the ship
Its deeper than spending time girls you don’t wanna kick it with
There’s shards of glass in the air, and certain levels of bitterness
Now the days are shorter, so drink another porter
Something dark and heavy, like what’s been weighing on your shoulders
I know Chicago can get brutal during the winter months
And you’re struggling to make enough to fill up your blunts
Probably coulda done more to hit him with the proper feedback
Explain that I been going through the same thing that he had
De Ja Vu, I had seen that, recovery and relapse
I know how every step forward is followed by like three back
He shrugged his shoulders and passed me a cig
I don’t know, fam. It is what it is
[Hook]
You could say you’re fine, but I know you’re lying
I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
Just need a ray of light, to make it through the night
I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
Man this can’t be right, god this can’t be life
I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
I’m hoping for something that’ll get us through the wintertime
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4. |
Gotta Go (feat. MPYRE)
03:05
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[hook]
When I’m faced these obstacles, I may be illogical
I’m so irresponsible, sorry I gotta go
I gotta go, I gotta go
I gotta go, I gotta go
I faded and out of yo, too many shots of those
Just so irresponsible, sorry I gotta go
I gotta go, I gotta go
I gotta go, I gotta go
[Verse 1]
On a Friday night, I think I had too much
I ain’t feelin right, I might a screwed up
I came here booed up, I got too boozed up
Sometimes I loose touch, I’m a nuisance
I might’a did her bad ,Don’t know what I did
But I can tell she mad, I should smoke a cig
This gon take min, I should tell her that
But I fell right back, Bouncer gone whoop my ass
She got her arms all crossed, Oh she don’t talk
Shit I can barely walk, Blame it on the alcohol
Sometimes I slip and fall, she aint having that
I’m a blatant ass, sorry you can’t relate that
I ask if she okay, she told me she’s all right
I said her tone disagrees, she says it’s not a fight
I asked if I can hit it later , she says not tonight
Too many shots tonight, ain’t getting box tonight
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5. |
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[Verse 1]
A dirty breeze from the north, the cold weather is here
Ash the square off the porch, I’ll do better this year
Cuz if I do this any worse, they gon take me in a hearse
Well before any friends or family will hear
About my demise, lets work a compromise
It’s time, put that yes sir and humility behind
All the problems I’ve accosted, way too many losses
Way too much nonsense from way too many bosses
Waking up nauseous, motherfuck I lost it
Pack my bags in the autumn now I’m ready the fall hit
Did doubles in July, was exhausted in August
Workin harder than all of yall, why I still ain’t got shit
I’m about to flip it over, colder in October
These wages ain’t gonna make old girl wish she never left you
I’m campin in a vestibule, halls you went through
Chapped lips, callused fingers, man all this shit I been due
Approaching a door, wipe the feet on floor
Enter with the confidence, like yeah I been here before
Time to extort, I ain’t afraid to use force, of course
Mask on my face, they got nothing to report
Made a dash, got away, fled the building in silence
Grab the bag, peep inside, walked away smiling
And that’s just where my mind went, sitting in this cursed room
Finish up this day dream, cuz I gotta get back to work soon
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6. |
Transparent
03:21
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[Verse 1]
I can see through you, transparent like purified water
Everything’s beautified, nothing hubris-tied and falters
We two humans tied, looking at the bluest skies and saunter
We just wonder and wander, with no place to go, but
It still feels like something we got control of, this whole love
Ay girl hold up, just give it time to grow, love
The sun shine through the looking glass, got me looking back
Like when you said “I love you” you never took it back
You knew more about me than I knew myself
And when times was hard, never too proud to use my help
And you’d go away for a while, I’d miss you like hell
We always kept it true, never used lies or stealth
But we were young, these were things we could get away with
As we start to get older, shit gets a little more complicated
We knew everything, cuz we were the only people we’ve ever dated
Til one of us gets complacent, and then everything changes
[Verse 2]
… Things are starting to get kinda translucent
Now I’m walking around clueless, I don’t know what to do, shit
You settled down with a new dude, and I got a few chicks
And it feels kinda useless, I know I’ve been stupid
… Now every new girl kinda pales in comparison
I dodge calls, ain’t tryin to move ford like Harrison
Shit’s embarrassing, you trying to see through me
Kinda cloudy, not too sure if you like the new me
Asking questions, like this ain’t how you used to be
What happened to you, this ain’t how it goes usually
She’s trying to picture a future for us, and that’s when it gets blurry
I can tell she wants that ring more than Steph Curry
I’m just trying to do my own thing, damn what’s the hurry
A few days go by, I don’t call and she starts to worry
Check my phone, unread messages, she says I miss ya
Then she sends one more, all right, now I get the picture
[Bridge]
Now I’ve seen more of the world, there’s not much out there for me
Most days so cloudy, most nights are so stormy
Most calls I’ve been ignoring, they just don’t seem important
Now it’s all foreign, someone shoulda warned them
All my lies are so shady, don’t know why you believe in them
New girls try to save me, I’ll be out before the evening ends
And that’s just how the season ends, we start all over
That’s when I black out, now I don’t at all know her
[Verse 3]
Let me sit back, rip a six pack of ways to escape
Empty word document, can’t find any proper ways to say
Cant figure it out, I’m completely opaque
Drink a domestic beer trying find the place where honesty stay
I’m probably, constantly too lost in my ways
Self-sabotage in the most boring obnoxious of ways
Things will never be like they were back in the old days
Fast years, slow days, wake up to a cold spray
Brush my teeth, dry my face, still barely awake
Every girl that ever moved me is married or engaged
Maybe that’s why I act out, I black out, can’t hold liquor
I wake in the morning sicker, things seem to go quicker
Last time we spoke, you had a different last name
I only changed my zip code and maybe I added weight
I lost a couple numbers from girls I probably should date
And I blocked you from ever being able to reach out to me
Could’ve used your help, it’s clear now I see
It’s clear now I see
It’s clear now I see
But it’s too late for me
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7. |
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8. |
I'm New Here (feat. Ski)
04:06
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[Verse 1]
With the last little hope that’s buried in me
Take it back the old school like elementary
Still stuck in the middle like LMNOP
Nod ya head to this BlacKeys, instrumental sings
Take my time with the rhyme, such a sentimental thing
Never know til I leave, what potential I bring
All I wanted was the life that they show on silver screens
Faced with D’Evils and Regrets that only Jigga’s seen
I heard he gave old girl a promise and a silver ring
That and this minimum wage been slowly killing me
I just wanted the world, instead I came up empty handed
Went from Pomp and Circumstances, to a life of certain frantic
And often circumstances, the gods will hurt your chances
I clean with soap, trying hide the dirt my hand’s touched
I must have downed a thousand bottles, trying to drown my sorrows
Climb up out of this stool, tell the fam I’ll see ya tomorrow
[Verse 2]
I stay in the city where they invented the two step
Let me dust off this microphone 1-2 check
I write a few checks, bills past due, stress
Been flip flopping different options, that’s just what I do best
I stay committed like, fuck this, who’s next?
Another reason to play my cards close to dude’s vest
You approach me like the sucker tatted on my face
Wai til I finished my beer cuz really I hate to waste
I offered you a sip, declined, said you hate the taste
It didn’t quite mean the same, this is your fault
It’s girls like you that tend to make the seasons change
And I ain’t ever believe in change, this is your call
Damn the world so large, kinda makes you feel miniscule
I’m hypercritical, trying to throw you your axis, as if,
Life isn’t cyclical, now I’m cynical,
Every night I sip a brew, toast to the ritual
[Outro]
Now we at the Hancock Tower, Signature room
Drinking a nine dollar beer, that should’ve been two
Man I did it all, just to witness this view
Still can’t help but to think this could’ve been you
Now we at the Hancock Tower, Signature room
Drinking a nine dollar beer, better make that two
Spent my whole life, trying to get a glimpse of that view
Overcome with this feeling that I should’ve had you
[Hook]
It’s like where I wanna go, who I be?
In life, what the fuck I know, nothing’s guaranteed
Cuz I, smoke a few cigs, drink a few beers
I know it’s been a while, but I’m still new here
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9. |
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[Verse 1]
Back when I was 15, might had a big dream
Destined to be making a living off a 16s
My whole life was finna be, pristine, just see
Then I started figuring out a bit of what this shit mean
Kurt Cobain was a hero to most, but he aint mean shit to me
Cuz I was on that hip hop back pack indie scene
Before that flat bill, snap back, skinny jeans
I wasn’t even skimming beats, I would rap on anything
My favorite emcees, I would pretend to be
Rap in front of the mirror but never invite my friends to see
That’s when I would be, my own biggest enemy
Cuz I thought it would happen eventually, even if I let it be
Motherfucker, it was destiny
I was on that pedigree, aint nobody better than me
Regretably, I would let my nerves get the best of me
Nine years later, now that dream rest in peace
[Verse 2]
Back when I was 21, we was having plenty fun
Twice a week, heavy drunk, I was in love with everyone
Dude, I think I mighta just met the one
New girl, old crew, had a nice set up
The glory days, before I knew what stress was
Back when we’d get a second chance when we would mess up
We’d drink the worst beers, but we’d have the best buzz
Sharing a drink with your best buds
And I ain’t even care what the score on the test was
Cuz I was bound to land a job, gonna get the best one
I was engulfed in the moment, didn’t care where I’d end up
Never thought I’d fall so hard when that end come
I had to leave the place where all of my friends was
Plus that girl shitted on me, when she wanted to end us
I was pushing brooms, trying to get some income
Stuck in some hard times, never thought were meant for us
[Verse 3]
Shit now I’m the same age Big got smoked
Decided to pack my bags, move to Chicago
Don’t matter where I go, still I grow
Just needed a change of scenery to instill my hope
I know, I gotta fall back
Steady applying to jobs, just praying for a call back
And if I do get the call, I don’t know at all
If I’m going in the right direction and all that
Stuck in my mid 20s with a receding hairline
Can’t afford cab fare, do you care if we share a ride
Everyone’s getting married or having their own kids
And I’m still getting comfortable in my own skin
I keep burning the candle on both ends
Until I stopped comparing me and them, they got their own shit
And I’ll always accept a call, from an old friend
Learned to stop worrying and enjoy this whole shit
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Goose Chicago, Illinois
Writer, rapper, and fan. Not always in that order.
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